I’ve been really honoured recently to speak to amazing groups – mainly women – in celebration of International Women’s Day.  How incredible it’s been, to be surrounded by talented, breath taking, powerful women really looking to make a difference in this world!

Wow they’ve been impressive!  I’ve truly been in awe!

The theme this year is “Each for Equal”…

It’s a theme really close to my heart, because most of my career was spent working in a man’s world, and in an environment that wasn’t equal – and believe me – I still have the scars to prove it!!

Yep.  Most days I was hanging tough.

When I was the first woman appointed to a very senior role in a global airline, the only comment from “executive management”  (who shall remain nameless!!) wasn’t about my qualifications or my ability to do the job…it was about the fact that I’d never make it in the role because I was a woman and “couldn’t cut it with the blokes”.

Really??  I told them I could piss standing up if I had to.  And occasionally I think I did!!

But because I was so determined to prove that not only could I cut it with the boys – that I could beat them at their own game, I often chose to let go of my integrity.  I chose to let go of so many important parts of me – my values, my beliefs, the things that were truly important to me – because that’s what I thought I needed to do to be “successful”.  That’s who I needed to be in order to be equal.

Because being a woman in that environment meant you were less…

So no pictures of my small boys, no talking about my family, no showing my feminine values because to show that side of me – the real me – would mean in so many ways my contribution would be dismissed.

I know for sure now that I was better leader because I was a mother not in spite of the fact (the word “multitasking” was invented for working mothers!!) but back then, being true to myself would have seriously impacted my career.

But eventually, my values became more important than the next promotion and I took the leap with a business partner to start my own company.  Kind of a drastic way to get equality, control and integrity back – but sometimes you’ve just gotta jump!!

I guess because I’m old (!!) and because I’ve “done a bunch of stuff” people often ask me what it takes to be successful in their career.

But here’s the thing…

You don’t have a career…you have a life…

The two aren’t mutually exclusive.  And if you want the magic to happen – you have to know how to bring the two together.  That’s what true success is.

So for what it’s worth, I’d love to share some of the lessons I’ve learnt – particularly in honour of International Women’s Day – about how to have not just a wild, crazy, successful career – but even more importantly, how to have a wild, crazy successful life!!

Here we go…my 5 easy steps!

 

Step One – Work Hard

One of my favourite quotes is from Cheryl Strayed – author of “Wild” who says:

“We don’t get to the top of the mountain by starting at the top of the mountain – we get there from starting at the bottom and climbing. There is blood involved”. 

Without a doubt – there is no substitute for hard work.  And yep….as you know probably all too well – there is always blood involved when you’re climbing to the top…you don’t get there any other way.

But here’s the interesting thing.  When I look back at my career, I know I spilt more blood than I needed to, because I often worked hard for the wrong reasons.

Firstly….I worked incredibly hard just for the sake of it because I was trying to prove things unnecessarily to myself and to others…trying to prove that I was better, stronger, more capable, that I was a superhero.

Wow…when I look back it was such a waste of energy and emotion!!  Please watch the superhero complex – having fallen hard for it myself I know how exhausting it can be.

And secondly – I spilt blood unnecessary trying to achieve this mythical ‘work life balance’ ideal that we’ve all be sold.

As a working mother I nearly killed myself trying to achieve work life balance – trying to write a board paper with one hand, make a papier-mâché dinosaur with the other, while stirring the ‘incredibly healthy and nutritious’ meal I was cooking for my family with the spoon in my mouth – all the time kicking myself for having missed my run in the morning. -knowing that without a doubt 3 extra centimetres were going to be on my hips by morning!

Trust me – there is no such thing as work life balance. It doesn’t exist. It is impossible to be perfect in all aspects of your life 100% of the time. I know. I tried and I failed!!

Instead….I’ve traded the myth of work life balance for harmony. Harmony is about accepting that sometimes if we’re to achieve amazing things, life will be out of balance and that’s OK. Because it’s about a scale.

It’s about realising that if you’ve got a tight deadline you might need to work until 2 in the morning and yep that means you won’t see your kids, you’ll be eating pizza (vegan of course!) and you won’t get your run in….but that’s ok.  When that deadline is over, you swing the scale the other way…do something special with your family, have a massage, eat cheesecake….and no matter what…don’t beat yourself up.

So absolutely…if you’re going to be successful you are going to need to work incredibly hard…but I have a caveat here.  Work hard but work hard for the right reasons and work hard in harmony.

 

Step Two – Seize Mentors

 My life has been inextricably changed because I was fortunate to have had incredible mentors in my life – people who saw things in me that I didn’t see in myself (they’ve subsequently had their eyes tested!), who took a chance on me, and who believed in me far more than I believed in myself.

My mentors took me under their wing – taught me what I needed to know, showed me what I needed to see and gave me the courage and the confidence to be who I needed to be.

Without a doubt…finding and seizing mentors has been critical to the success of my career.

But I don’t just seize mentors in business….as CEO Of Sue Hollis Inc, I grab hold of mentors for all areas of my life…..I have an amazing “board of directors” around me that mentor me in business, wellness, exercise, spirituality, motorbike racing…for all the important areas of my life I surround myself with the very best people that I can learn and grow from…because to be my best I have to continually learn from the best.

 

 Step Three – Take Risks

 There’s a beautiful quote from Anais Nin:

“Our life shrinks or expands in proportion to our courage“.

 I’ve learnt…sometimes the hard way…that to have a truly expanded life and career, have to be brave and you have to take risks.

 When it comes to taking risk, I’ve always asked two questions:

     “What’s the worst that could happen?”

and…

     “Is it going to kill me?”

Yep, in life there are a few risks that could kill you, but in your career?  What’s the worst that can happen?  They fire you?

Well, as painful as that might be, you’ll survive being fired.  I’ve been fired and I’m still here!!  I’m proof it’s worth taking the risk!

There isn’t a role I’ve taken that hasn’t scared the life out of me…where I haven’t felt completely out of my depth…or felt that the job was waaaay too big for me to handle. But that’s half the fun of it!  Being scared and still going for it!

Don’t get me wrong…I’ve taken plenty of risks where I’ve had spectacular failures….and things really haven’t gone to plan…but every time I’ve learnt, I’ve grown, and I’ve become stronger and more confident.

I’ve taken huge career risks where I’ve been completely terrified.  Jobs where every morning I’d tell myself, “Today will be the day they work out I don’t have a clue and they fire me”…..and when that didn’t happen I’d go home every night thinking, “Tomorrow will be the day they’ll work out I don’t have a clue and they’ll fire me.”

But they never did…and eventually I stopped telling myself that and got on with the job.

When I left the safety of a corporate life to start my own company, I asked “so that’s the worst that could happen?”

Well…my kids could end up eating mince and baked beans for years…which they did, but never together……my “corporate heavy” ego could take a serious smack – which happened but it helped me realise I’m not my business card…I could fail spectacularly and lose everything – and yep I came close a couple of times…..for many years I certainly hung out there in the wilderness!

And yet – what an experience…what a roller coaster ride…what an adventure!  I’d take that risk again in a heartbeat.

So have the courage to live an expanded life….be brave…say yes to everything knowing that potentially you’ll get bruised, but that you’ll heal.  Take risks…after all, what’s the worst that can happen??

 

Step 4 Stay in Your Integrity

In everything – work and life – be true to yourself.  I felt the need to be someone I wasn’t early in my career and it tore at my soul.

Never compromise who you are – your values, what you stand for or your integrity.  It’s not necessary and it’s not worth it!

Success is all the more sweet when you achieve it as your authentic self!

 

And Lastly – Live!!

Yes you have a commitment to your career but far more importantly…you also have a commitment to live!

I have a simple philosophy…

“Never live a porridge life. Life it too short to settle for grey, boring oatmeal. Life should be  granola…full of fruit and nuts and yoghurt!”

One of the hardest things in this world is to be true to yourself……to be true to what you want and not what others want of you.  And in being true to yourself, one of the hardest questions you can ever ask yourself is….

     “Does this make me happy?”

We often don’t ask ourselves this question, because we’re too afraid of the answer.

Because if the answer is “no” – then we absolutely, categorically have to act.

I woke up one morning and realised I wasn’t happy. I loved my company and my team…but I didn’t love my job.   So I stepped away, appointed an amazing CEO, bought a new motorbike and went travelling around the US by myself for 4 months.

For me, living is about not being defined by a role…I’ve spent years doing that.  Living full out is about curiosity, exploring and collecting ticks in different boxes – corporate warrior, CEO, entrepreneur, coach, runner, bike racer, speaker, climber, author…the more ticks in life, the better!  Bring on that granola!

And so…amazing, talented women – and men – remember that careers are incredibly important, but so is living.  In building spectacular careers, don’t neglect something even more important…the importance of building a life that is full and invigorating and sometimes even a little terrifying!  It’s your life….no one else is going to do it for you….so you’ve gotta own it!

So stop hanging tough.  Take responsibility, trust that you’ve got all the skills and the talent you need and step up to the plate!  You’ve got a wild, crazy successful life just waiting for you!